Today's Specials...........

So, what's on the menu for today at Chateu Benjamin?

This is the bountiful breakfast of radioactive champions everywhere. I'm on clear liquids today and for breakfast I had Jello and tea.

I am indebted to Magnificent Mary, My Matrimonial Mate for the Jello. That gal sure can cook! It's why I married her you know.

The tea was provided by the Simply Sweet Sonya who made it herself and brought it by before work. It's a combination of green tea and white tea and has just a hint of mint.

Aren't you wishing you were me today?

After such a tremendous breakfast, one might be temped to sit back and rub their belly for the rest of the day and simply reminisce, a sort of mental rumination over the flavorful feast that broke last nights fast.

A Lunch That Won't Bunch

After such a fine morning's repast, a light lunch is in order.

"Broth and tea for me", you say?

You'd be right! And what a delight..... Here we have a savory chicken broth and the home-made green and white tea. Or is it the other way around?

Looks like twin urine samples.

Dinner Fit For The Throne

How could one possibly ask for more?

Here's a dinner for those who would rather pass.....

One might think, "I can't stand any more!" but this
is a feast that will compel you to sit..... for the rest of the evening.

Starting off with a four course meal of Bisacodyl conveniently packaged in a foil-backed blister pack. This meal would be enough to elicit delighted moans and much belly rubbing from the casual diner, but for those with more sophisticated palates, the coup de grâce is that the meal comes with not one, but two bottles of the finest Phospho-soda from Fleet. Together this combination is guaranteed to open streams of expressive outbursts from tummy rubbing diners for the remainder of the evening. I'm sure that those partaking in such a feast will be surprised at renewed outpourings just when they thought the evening's festivities had settled down.

Why does the lighting in that picture look more ominous than the others?

Anyhow, all this to get a nice clean scan tomorrow and hopefully a reading that shows no new cancer.

Officially Radioactive........

Took my dose of radioactive I131 today. I can be in the same room with people, but no hugging and have to keep a little distance (arms length). I also have to eat off of paper plates with disposable utensils and drink from disposable cups and I have to flush twice whenever going to the bathroom.

Tomorrow the real fun begins. I only get clear liquids to eat or drink and in the evening I get to start on......

THE CLEANSING......

How in the world could I have forgotten about that?!?! I think I must have blocked it out. There are four little pills and two vials of vile liquid designed to make everything that's inside try to get outside as quickly as possible. Having the big "D" when you're feeling good is no big deal, but this is not just a case of the "trots" but a full tilt run where the stakes of not being quick enough would mean having to clean up a radioactive toxic mess from an explosion that gives "going nuclear" a scatalogical twist. This is the Super "Bowl" version of the big "D" and it comes at a time when I have trouble breathing or walking and every fiber of my physical body feels as though it's been taxed to the limit already.

Come tomorrow evening, I don't think I'll be in the living room. I'll be camped out just a few feet from the "stadium" where this whole drama will play out. At least we hope it all stays in the stadium!

My muscles are so tight that drying off after a shower or putting on a T-shirt feels like the final reps of a shoulder workout pushed to failure. Those folks who've checked out my forearms and the meaty part of my thumbs look at me like, "Yeah, yeah. How tight could they be?" As soon as they touch those locations their eyes widen in shocked disbelief. It's not a mock look of surprise either. They keep touching my arms or thumbs and offering a mix of condolences, sympathy and disbelief. It's kind of interesting that nobody has just felt the muscles once and been satisfied but everyone has to feel them again and again as if to reassure themselves that they really are that swollen and hard. Body builders would probably kill for that, but I'd opt for a softer reality if it meant feeling better.

When I walk I noticed that my feet turn out a lot. I try to turn them in but the swelling is what seems to be causing it and it takes some effort to line them up straight if only for a bit. When I do my inner thighs are pressed hard together and feel like they're about to split through the skin. I keep telling myself, "Just a few days more and hopefully I can restart the meds."

Time to completely type this post? Three hours.........

Tired.....

Bleah!

I'm off my meds (don't worry, I'm not dangerous - probably less so than normal actually) and feel really tired....... and sore....... and a lot of other things..... none of which are particularly good.

I've been off the main one for about a month now and was really getting tired, but went off the other medication this past Saturday. Whoa! Crash! Things started spiraling down by the end of the day and I was exhausted. Went to a Birthday party and wasn't very sociable at all.

Sunday I decided I'd still play my trumpet and sing during praise. On the second song I was really starting to worship...... Just kidding. For those in the know Carlos III did a great job last week defining what worship is and is not. I just threw that in because it's right out of the presentation. The proper response being, "Well what were you doing during the first song?"

The truth is that by the second song I was really feeling fatigued in my facial muscles and in the middle of the third song I decided to stop playing trumpet since all I could muster was a sound that can only be described as "wet flatulance". Not conducive to worship. I finished that song vocally but could only sing through half the next one before I was straining to make easy notes come quavering out of my mouth. The next song I grabbed the Djimbe (a drum) and finished with a flop.

Today I went to work though and felt worse in the morning than I did in the afternoon. Whoever's praying, thanks. That's all for now. Kinda tired. Goin' to bed.